"Revenge is the purest
emotion"
- Dronacharya, in the Mahabharata
"Revenge is a dish best served
cold"
- Anonymous
"Give life for life, eye for eye,
tooth for tooth, hand for hand, foot for foot"
"Beloved, never avenge yourselves,
but leave it to the wrath of God, for it is written"
- The Bible
"The old law of 'an eye for an eye'
leaves everybody blind"
- Mahatma Gandhi
"Before you embark on a journey of
revenge, dig two graves."
- Confucius, Chinese philosopher &
reformer (551 BC - 479 BC)
"The best revenge is just moving on
and getting over it. Don't give someone the satisfaction of watching you
suffer."
- Susan Gale
"If you prick us do we not bleed? If
you tickle us do we not laugh? If you poison us do we not die? And if you
wrong us shall we not revenge?"
- Shakespeare, in 'The Merchant of Venice'
“If you keep going over the past, you're
going to end up with a thousand pasts and no future (on revenge)"
- Dialogue from "The Secret in their
Eyes"
(images from the net)
I recently saw an Academy award winning Argentine film, El secreto de sus ojos ('The Secret in their
eyes', Spanish language, released 2009). In this movie, a person's wife
gets killed by a person from her hometown. The police are initially unable to
catch hold of the killer as the investigations lead to nothing. He is then
found, convicted and jailed, but, due to the changed government, immediately freed.
He later vanishes. The husband thirsts for revenge. The police officer investigating
the case states that the killer will be caught and given death penalty. But the
husband tells him that he should not get death penalty but nothing less than a
life "full of nothing". The police are unable to find the killer now
that he has vanished. The police office investigating the case also gives up,
though it comes back to haunt him every now and then. After 25 years, the
police officer gets to meet the husband. At his house, he is shocked to find
that the husband has caught hold of the killer and jailed him in his house,
giving him only a morsel of food a day and not speaking to him at all. The
killer is a totally forgotten person and his life is now full of 'nothing', so
much so that he might as well die. He begs the police officer to ask the
husband to "atleast speak to
me". Thus, as wished by the husband, he avenges the killing of his
wife by making the person live, nay exist, in nothingness. Revenge.
This post on revenge is an extension to the post on
forgiveness.
What is revenge? In pure terms, it is the action of hurting
or harming someone in return for an injury or wrong suffered at their hands. Do
you feel like avenging something done by someone which has hurt you in any way?
When I was in class 5, a friend of mine caused a head injury to
my brother. I remember chasing him all through the streets of my locality and
finally when I reached his house with a stone in hand, his relatives confronted
me. One of them told me, "What will happen after you hit him with this
stone? You need to forget and move on. He has apologized for his actions".
I don't know what overcame me, but I threw the stone down and walked back home.
I did not feel picking it up again. We became friends later and are still good.
The issue with revenge is that it eats you up completely. It
does not allow your mind to think of anything else but retribution. How can I
get even with the person? Often, it makes you do really petty things which you
would not otherwise do, as the heart is increasingly filled with hate and one
starts getting a myopic satisfaction from these petty things. At some point, it
destroys the person's life and makes his lose his senses. He becomes miserable.
I feel that as far as possible, one should not allow the
feeling of vengeance to cultivate because it only grows and cannot be
destroyed. The wounds are kept open all the time and you feel them fresh every
day. One needs to move forward, not focus on the past, though it is easier said
than done.
In the Mahabharata, the mother of Shishupala hears a heavenly
voice saying that that Shishupala would die one day in the hands of the person
who held him in his lap. Krishna holds him in his lap when he comes to meet the
family and she, remembering the heavenly voice, requests Krishna to forgive
Shishupala any offence one hundred times, thinking that it would take a
lifetime for a person to commit so many offences. But, Shishupala never
lets go of an opportunity to insult Krishna. Krishna pardons him every time and
does not exact any revenge on him, as promised to his mother. Krishna promises
to forgive him one hundred times. After the hundredth offence, he kills
Shishupala, whose soul merges with him. Krishna clarifies that he killed him
not for revenge, but for the welfare of Shishupala's soul. Still, if He can
wait for a hundred offences...
17 comments:
Inna seidharai oruthal avarnaana nannayam seidhu Vidal
Best way to punish one who wronged is do good to him. One rider, don't do that good deed with the aim of embarrassing him. Just do it, for its always between you and God and not you and him. Once we get it, or start making an effort to get it.... Doing nannayam will be easier done than said....
I think it has to start first. The first time you do this provides the impetus. Then it becomes a matter of routine. Good point!
I cant agree that all sins/wrong deeds, irrespective of it being big or small, can be forgiven.
Revenge starts because the individual taking revenge feels as though the law will not do justice. We are not saints, nor rishmuni that we will forgive everything. but then how we will get the justice, Ok you and your friends became good friends but he would have had behaved again in the same manner then what you would have had done. It may not be a revenge but there has to be a punishment, I hope I am not diverting your topic
Raji, there is no checklist on forgiveness. Forgiveness is a personal thing and there is no ideal action that can or should be forgiven. It is upto every individual. The only issue is that it stays with you
Thanks for your comment, Shraddha. As I said, revenge or forgiveness is a personal thing. The weight on the heart matters. Can you take it? Or not? If so, for how long?
"Vengeance Is Mine, I Will Repay,” says the Lord. Romans 12:19–21 says, Beloved, never avenge (inflit harm in return for an injury or wrong done to oneself or another) yourselves, but leave it to the wrath of God, for it is written, “Vengeance is mine, I will repay, says the Lord.”
Yes, also "Father forgive them for they don't know what they are doing" ! Isn't it? But who listens?
Well written! Moving forward is the only way to wipe off the negative feelings that smother us.
Yes, indeed! it is difficult but perfectly possible
Ah cabt help recollecting Maslow's pyramid of needs. Every action that humans do arise from some need. Some need must be fulfilled. Even if the action is totally selfless and highly philanthropic. It fulfills the need of a person to belong within the community for which those selfless acts are carried out. The same goes for revenge. It MUST be fulfiling some need in a person. Morality and ethics are subjects far macro than needs(theory expounded by MASLOW). When a person takes revenge I really dont think he/she thinks about morality and difference between right and wrong, or how his/her deeds are going to affect his/her family, friends, or for that matter a complete stranger...
While its all good, to say revenge is good or bad or it leaves a person miserable etc.....but come to think of it, the person did what he/she " needed " to do, not just what he/she "wanted" to do, but what he/she "needed" to do.
I think one is driven by motivation to fulfil inner desire/need which gets satiated by many things/dishes.....at times the name of the dish is ...REVENGE!!
Just like having any physical food which is digested by our system to given us energy...I am sure REVENGE is also a source of energy which makes us motile.....!!
It is indeed difficult to justify revenge or justify not taking revenge just because of the plain fact that one cannot place himself in another's shoes. The individual needs to ponder over the fact whether he wants to undertake the course of action or not. I agree with you that attaching morals to the act of revenge is certainly a matter of perception and under social pressure.
Just out of curiosity...how big a stone was it that you held while chasing your friend?
Moving on is easier said than done. You're compelled to move on when you have something further to lose as a fallout of the revenge extraction process. But when you're left with nothing...then revenge is the only closure.
However, as Edmond Dantes discovered in the Count of Monte Cristo, revenge is an empty feeling. You derive no joy or satisfaction from it...as wrongly portrayed in our movies. Bragging rights maybe...but thats it
I guess I was in class five...so it should be the size of two cricket balls max! I fully agree, but I know of a lot of people who derive satisfaction from revenge!
What goes around comes around, right?
Why bother with elaborate plans for revenge.
But it's surely entertaining to read such stuff.
One of my all time favourites is the book ' not a penny more, not a penny less' by Jeffrey Archer deals with the idea of revenge.
Some people do derive satisfaction from revenge. It is relative and depends on what you want. Sometimes, success also is a way of revenge. The best way, perhaps?
Thanks for the comment. :)
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