27 hours - Part - II

(continued)

There are quite a number of travellers from Bombay to Pune who use the Mail / Express trains. My portion of the compartment emptied in Pune. Then, there was a cascade. One family with six kids and five adults jumped in for four berths. Just four berths. Two of the six kids did not look like kids even as per any lenient railway manual. The leader of the group just asked them to occupy.... Like a 'Occupy Wall Street movement'! Already in a corner, I was cornered further. The man said, 'Push and sit, uncle will adjust '!  Excuse me, but shouldn't 'uncle' be consulted? Thankfully, there was no one sitting on my lap! Some presence of mind told me to persuade them to push the kids onto the upper berth. There was some semblance of freer air.

Suddenly, most of the members of this family started in a cry fest. One had to see it to believe. I am not making it up, but yes, for a full ten minutes, they were sort of uncontrollable as they were leaving their relatives at Pune and leaving for Madras. The great Indian goodbye. Damn emotional chaps, aren't we?

I knew it was going to be tough, with so much chatter n noise. Upgrade, please? The Gods have better prayers to answer than a measly upgrade. I understand. Moreover, what can be the assurance that there is no ten member family occupying five seats in the a/c compartment and asking the 'uncle'  to adjust?

Test of endurance, patience and willpower. I can. Should I have not thought twice about the 12k plane ticket? Am I being too fussy? I have made so. Many trips like this before. Show off! Snob! OK, get me the watery coffee-less milk-less sugar less railway coffee atleast! Coffee-flavored hot water for ten bucks. Yes, there went in the third cup. And we had just crossed Pune. Close to 24 hours more!  I hoped no kid is going to share 'uncle's' bed! One of the kids had already started throwing groundnut coverings from the upper berth. Ah, where are those pretty heroines who come in 'movie' trains? Why me, every time?

And hey, to top it all, I had a weird dream... A dragon was chasing me along some ice-covered mountains! The jerks created by the train in no manner aided in reducing the impact of the 'dream run' across the mountains. That I was running alone with no heroine alongside me made the run even more daunting. May be I was fighting with the dragon for the princess! As with most dreams, the closest the dragon got to me, it broke! I did not know if the magic sword worked! Ah, Super Mario! Did he get the princess or not? Keep guessing! Surprisingly, except for the dragon and the mountains, I could manage better sleep than I get at home these nights!

 Safety is a big issue on trains. One has to be alert and watchful. Shoes, bags anything can get knocked off. It is an art, the way random people keep flitting in and out of compartments and get off richer with bags, shoes, dresses and what not. It is best to travel light if you can help it as there will be lesser luggage to watch over. Moreover, most Indians carry their home with them and generally, there is no space to place your luggage. More so, if you are getting in the train in a station in between.

During the course of my railway studies, I had extensive training as to how to function as a ticket examiner, booking clerk et al. Southern railway is generally tough on rule breakers - ticket less travel, age barred kids etc. ID cards are strictly scrutinized, particularly for senior citizens who travel on confessional fares. This family that travelled in my  portion of the compartment had to pay a penalty for under declaring the age of a couple of kids. This, after the examiner spoke to the kids and made them say which class they were in - kids don't know to lie to questions like 'Which class are you in?' unless they are tutored! But it's not easy to play tutor for questions where the examiner starts with 'What is your name?' and what subject you like  to the all important question of 'Which class do you study?'. Game over for the parents. Simple psychology in five minutes!

Once we get used to certain comforts in life, it becomes difficult to go back to more 'austere' living conditions. No big deal, but some degree of discomfort is indeed to be endured. One has to just assimilate with the crowd and the journey turns pleasant. I did that, and the rest of the journey was pleasant. There are small things that you keep noticing on trains. How people are together, how they take care of each other, things they share..The family that was in my portion bought idlis for everyone in their group. Everyone ate but the youngest of the kids did not. They noticed it only after they all had finished their Tiffin. The way they fawned over him, found that he wanted biscuits and tea and made a smile come to his lips by getting those for him was a fascinating sight.

Some read, listen to music, chat..... Sometimes completely unknown persons speak as if they are acquainted for a long time. I swapped my lower berth with an elderly couple who were booked on an upper berth. Gave my window seat to the kids - ah, the smile on their faces! 'Thank you uncle!'  - now, that felt good! I mentally reprimanded myself for being the snob that I was a few hours back. 

An elderly man sitting opposite me had just experienced his first plane travel and was recounting how it was - the take off, the air conditioning, coffee for a hundred bucks, the bumpy landing...it was interesting to listen.

I did not know whether I got used to the journey or I started liking it, but it just takes that bent of mind to live with things, circumstances and people. It is perhaps in the head.

 But yes, all said and done, one day plus three more hours on a train is tiring indeed. Very. 1200-plus kms in 27 hours throws an average speed of 45 kmph.... Awfully slow, even if you take into account the number of stops and signal halts. In such crowded compartments, one cannot stretch legs, loosen one's body... Feels claustrophobic at times. Having studied for a railway job I shouldn't be harsh on them, but it's like what some American baseballer defined cricket as - 'baseball on valium!' (That quote was pre 20-20, though!) Sometimes waiting in the train when it stops during a hot hot afternoon in the middle of nowhere could be like watching paint dry.

 Andhra is a cauldron. Food is spicy (who does not like 'Andhra meals'?) , climate is hot. We say in Madras that we have three seasons - hot, hotter, hottest. Parts of Andhra (Telangana included) are no better. Wading through the state on a May afternoon in a train sets you up for a roast fest. Jennifer Lopez be damned, everyone gets a hot butt!

Answering nature's call in trains is a really tough thing to do if you are a cleanliness freak. Even when it comes to a/c compartments, the cleanliness levels of the toilets leaves a lot to be desired. The best way to keep off is, as I said before, schedule your fast while on such journeys!

This train journey was uneventful - Thank God! - but interesting and endurable given that I was travelling in the hottest of months.

27 hours later, after waiting outside Madras Central for a good 30 minutes for a platform, my train chugged in. I came out of the station and there she was ...weather beaten.......sun kissed......rain swept........ resplendent than the reddish of reds.....with the familiar friendly face and that question on her lips......"What do you want?" Ah Madras, my dearest Madras!

I am strangely looking forward to my next long distance train journey. Even more strangely, I am thinking of booking second class and  not planning to request for an upgrade!