When one has to let go of things

Focus not on letting go of things – focus on taking hold of your thoughts

- The Bhagavad Gita

“Some of us think holding on makes us strong, but sometimes it is letting go.”

– Hermann Hesse

“When one door closes, another opens; but we often look so long and so regretfully upon the closed door that we do not see the one which has opened for us.”

– Alexander Graham Bell

“Your past does not equal your future.”

– Anthony Robbins

“We must be willing to let go of the life we’ve planned, so as to have the life that is waiting for us.”

– Joseph Campbell

There is an analogy in Test cricket – on a seaming wicket with overcast conditions and a new ball to boot, for the opening batsmen to lay a stron foundation for the team’s score, they have to primarily do one thing – stay there. Leave as many balls as possible, defend or whatever, but not try anything foolhardy as the new ball, the seaming wicket and the weather conditions make it difficult for strokeplay. But if you show some patience, you will be able to learn how the wicket behaves, see the shine of the new ball and then play your shots.

Which is why Test cricket is a test of character and patience is one of those that you have to exhibit. So, you let go of many balls as possible as they may contain a potential landmine.

Life’s like that. At times, when you are stuck with things, the only answer to them seems to be time. There is a colleague of mine, who, when confronted with situations, keeps telling me, “just leave it; time will take care of it.” This is an approach that he has been following for many of life’s challenges – personal or professional. He tells me that the best answers to the problems or situations, to mildly put them, lies in being able to just stay there and weather the storm.

But is it so easy? Or is it difficult? Yes, a mixture of both. The key in letting things go is that they help in presenting different phases of life to you. Many a time, these worries are things that you can never do much about. They only end up spoiling your current phase of life, which can never be regained. I, like everyone else, wish I had answers to a lot of situations that life throws at me, but I don’t. None of us has. The worries are the negative things that end up one overthinking and leading oneself to depression. I am not saying one should be impervious to situations and thought – I wish it was so easy – but one needs to force oneself to tide it over and not focus. It is not easy, particularly if you are alone, but it certainly not impossible. And there is no other way to come out of this.

Emotional reactions to situations you cannot do anything about result in an impact on physical health. You never know - some time from now, the thing that you were giving so much importance to, may not be even relevant at all then! A favourite quote of mine – Life is what happens when you are busy planning things.

People, things, situations come and go in our life. People, are like chapters in a book called life – there is always another chapter waiting to be read. So once you end one, there is another waiting. So are situations. So the key to seemingly unsolvable situations is try to ignore them – they end by themselves. I have seen in life that situations which seemed so giant and unsolvable have gone past that I may don’t even remember some of them.

Let of the ‘why me?’ thought process. On a plane, you are always better than most people in this world – on many counts. No one has a bed of roses in life, they make it seem so. Which means they have mastered the art of letting it go. Yes they have. It’s time we all learnt that.

Once you learn to appreciate what you have and concentrate on things that make you happy, you will learn the art of letting these seemingly painful situations go; you can actually see them dissipate that at one point of time you will start ignoring them.

There is one thing I keep telling myself – bad things happen so that great things result. If the bad things did not happen, then I may not be able to appreciate the great things in my life. Everything happens for a reason. I just love this oft used line – ‘Life is all about timing’. Count your blessings. If something in your life is going to change, it will happen when you don’t expect it; maybe even so naturally that you don’t realize it happening - when the timing is just right. You need to be ready for it. And things will happen at that time. It is just that you have to tide the ‘bad’ days like the opening Test batsmen tide those bad overs.